Evidence

...In every season, from where I’m standing 

    I see the evidence of Your goodness

    All over my l life, all over my life

    I see  Your promises in fulfillment...

-Evidence Josh Baldwin

    The other day, the temperature dipped and I found myself wanting to go for a walk, this is rare because in the Memphis heat rarely do I want to go for a walk. But nevertheless, I was halfway around the block, when suddenly this song came on. The lyrics reminded me of God’s goodness throughout my WHOLE life. Although the current season had left many shaken, myself included, I knew that God was and will continue to be present, all I had to do was look. 

    In any good detective case, the evidence is all around. You just have to look for it. This is important because the truth of God’s love may not be as easily uncovered.  God’s hand print has graciously touched every facet of our life. I remember considering moving to Memphis, to be closer to family during this past season and how God’s provision had provided every door to be opened and the perfect work schedule to be obtained. I consider the evidence that a routine examination would uncover a cancerous cyst growing inward, which was rare in itself. I consider the evidence that when I feel alone,the word, his promises, remind me that I am never alone. The evidence is all around us.

    So if you find yourself shaken, not understanding the chaos that might surround you. I encourage you to take a moment. Examine the details and look for the evidence that God has been there all along. This may be done through reflection, meditation, or journaling. But I guarantee you, that if you take a second to reflect, you will find evidence of God’s love all around you. 

5 More Ways to ask your Children "How was your Day"

It is vital that as parents we continue to pastor our children in ways that are sharp with technique and purpose. Did you know that the job title of a youth pastor has only been around since the 1950’s? Before that the original youth and children’s pastors were parents. So parents, we’ve got to perk up and get involved in our children’s lives. One of the best ways to do so is through conversation. Here are 5 MORE ways you can ask your child “How was your day?”

1. Can you teach me something I don’t know? Growing up, I had an uncle who was just always happy. Every time I saw him, he had the glow. He had the ability to light up a room and ask us the best questions. Reflecting on our interactions now I can honestly pinpoint why our interactions were so special. It was because he spoke to us as “little thinkers.” He didn’t be little our opinion but truly waited and listened to our response. This is essential for us as parents. We’ve got to empower our children as problem solvers, that way as they grow up they’ll be able to translate that confidence in every area. Taking this opportunity to learn from your kiddos can absolutely accomplish that!

2. How were you brave today? Yes, the emotion and act of “bravery” is important. It’s that moment where fear strikes the body and we need a little push beyond that to overcome our hurdle. Asking your child how they were brave, will instill the start of looking for this emotion each day. They will start to look for opportunities and become more aware of such emotions. Also the feeling can be fleeting, therefore, if your child doesn’t notice the feeling yet sure enough over time they will surely start. 

3. Rate your day on a scale of 1-10? Asking your child to quantitatively rate their day will allow them a few opportunities. The first being reflection. They will be able to stop and think about this day and how it compares to others. Ofcourse, the rating is subjective but that’s not really the point. It’s about getting your child to think outside the box of each day and will encourage him to think larger than the day at hand. If this doesn’t happen immediately, the reflection will start to encourage some major inventory gathering each day. Also, if one day rates worse than the other, it can open the doors for additional follow up questions such as: What makes today a 7 and yesterday a 5? Or I know today you had a 6 but I wonder what a 9 would look like? Your child communicating their thoughts is the goal here and it’s a joy to hear their little minds dissect their thoughts. 

4. What is something that challenged you? The thought of a challenge is key to progress and growth. I think admitting that something is hard is key to growing up. Too often we internalize these challenges and as a result find ourselves either not celebrating the achievement or not understanding the struggle. Your child can start to acknowledge those difficult moments; therefore letting others know or they can learn to celebrate accordingly. Either way what a win for you and your little one to process through. 

5. If you could switch seats with anyone in class, who would it be? And why? Empathy is absolutely important. With the virtual world all around us, one can forget that there is a breathing life at the other end of internet conversations. Consider how one wouldn’t yell certain comments at people in real life, but somehow on the internet such remarks are only tolerated they are glorified. Teaching your child, empathy and what it would be like to be in another’s seat accomplishes this feat. Asking to pause and consider their life from another’s vantage point will breed understanding about how they might consider other’s emotions and choices. When we can do this as children and have it trickle into adulthood, we will all be better well rounded adults. 

Being a parent is difficult. There are no manuals that come with our children. And for many of us, it’s figuring it all out as we go. We’ll make mistakes that’s certain, but if we can start to initiate some of these questions we can better help each child learn the necessary tools they need to communicate and cope with life as a child and into adulthood.

Custom Made

What a time to be alive! We live in a world where anything can be custom made. Ever wanted a mug with your face on it? Done. How about a bobblehead with your best friend’s head? Done. Custom shoes, custom car, custom house? Done. Most of these things are just one click away. Notice also the prestige of having a  custom made item. If it’s “1 of 1” then you are classy and have wealth. Here is where we can create some real traction. God has designed us all with exact purpose and personal touch. We are all custom made in the image of God and that means we too are “1 of 1.” There is no one exactly like you. The truth here is that since God designed us, it’s important to know how special you are and how you are uniquely designed. 

Nehemiah from the Old Testament is one of those uniquely designed persons God created. Nehemiah had great personal skill. He was a great leader, delegator and knew how to plan. This is probably how he rose to a high rank in the King of Persia’s kingdom. It was here that God called him for His specific purpose: to rebuild the wall around the city of David. He used prayer and fasting but also some personal skill to get the job down. It took just 52 days with God’s help to accomplish this impossible task. 

God used Nehemiah’s unique skills to do His work, and God wants the same for us. What are your unique skills that God can receive glory for? He gave them to you anyways, why not use it to glorify Him? You are custom made for His purpose. You are unique and of great value to Him. Let us move forward ever pursuing His purpose for our lives. 

“Then I said to them, “You see the trouble we are in: Jerusalem lies in ruins, and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace. I also told them about the gracious hand of my God on me and what the king had said to me. They replied, ‘Let us start rebuilding.’ So they began this good work. “

Nehemiah 2:17-18 

You are mist

There are only two guarantees in life: 1) we're all going to die one day 2) nothing will stay the same. I know, both are a little morbid but stick with me. Death is scary especially since for many there is uncertainty beyond life here on earth. And we like to pretend that everyone will stay the same, but reality is that the moment that you are experiencing and living in will never recreate itself. Life is always moving, with or without you discretion.

So how do you keep up? Do you live anxiously  , anticipating every future moment, hoping NOT to die? Or do you live lethargically, knowing that life is passing by, reminiscing on the days gone by? 

The answer is neither.

Each day is precious and a gift. The moments you can stop, breath, and appreciate them are moments that carry their weight in gold. It's so important to understand that "Yes!" death is coming, so live today with purpose. Enjoy that friend, talk to your son, pause for that moment. Along with that, know where you are going after you die. If you are not sure ask a believer, what's the hesitation? Knowing what happens after death is one of greatest source of peace one can get. With that, with change always occurring put down your device enjoy the moments around you. Listen, you can take more in when you are not recording, posting, or tagging. Being present is the best way to ensure those moments don't pass. Practically? Do this every once in a while, pause lift your head up and look around. Find a face, smile at that face and ask "How can I show love to that person God has placed in my path?"

"Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life?

YOU ARE A MIST [emphasis added]

that appears for a little while and then vanishes."

James 4:14

What's the story?

I'll be honest, i've never been much of a reader. I've loathed over having to read books. As a matter a fact, I remember dropping 10th English honors because I did not want to read the summer reading list. A decision I regret to this day. Despite not being much of a reader, I do enjoy and value a good story.

A prominent leader once said that it takes an average person about 10 years worth of experience to write a book. So the way he figured, if he read 1 book a year, he'd be gaining the experience of 10 years with each book. I recently finished a book, that had a lifetime's worth of experience and wisdom. The Imam's Daughter tells the story of a Pakistani Muslim growing up in late 80's to mid 90's England. It tells the story of her terrible struggle through cultural norms as well as personal hardships, that included sexual abuse and torment. Hannah a pseudonym  for the author and teller of the story eventually found faith as she detailed her slow road to recovery. The key to opening that door was Love.

Here's what I walked away with. Never discredit the impact of the simple act of love. At times we might have to love someone implicitely. A simple smile or door holding might do. However, other times, we might have to show love with big motions and waves of acceptance and an outpouring of love. In those times, we must not be afraid to love lavishly. The way God loves us lavishly. May we take the time to understand and hear each other's stories and may we be ready to LOVE greatly, when the opportunity comes.

All in a walk...

To walk with someone is interesting. Walking is a seamless act that takes certain amount of connectivity to continue. We normally don't walk with people we don't know. We tend to walk with people we do know and  at the same time are more likely to walk with people who have similar destinations. Think about the last time you walked into the mall. Who did you go with? was it your wife, kids, parents... Or we you alone, and happen to walk in with a stranger. Anyhow, walking is something that if done with the right person, reason, and destination can change the trajectory of your life.

Who you walk with, changes who you become.

I think about Enoch in this situation. The Bible mentions Enoch in Genesis 5:24 in quite a simple manner that is beyond powerful. Enoch walked faithfully with God; then he was no more, because God took him away. What a powerful picture! Enoch walked with God, but he did so FAITHFULLY and because of that his life ended like few in the world since then. He was beamed up with God. Well not necessarily beamed but you know what I mean.

Let's take this into consideration, let's invite God to Walk with us daily, because our every moment depends on it. Because if you walk with God (the right person), with the right reason (His will), and the correct destination (Heaven/His will) in mind, your trajectory will be of the charts!

Divide

It seems like every where we look, divide is prevalent. Where one stands on "this issue" or "that topic" is the main focus.

I've never really understood the need of denominational divide. Don't get me wrong i understand the need for spiritual structure, organization, accountability and community. However, I have never understood the point of divide. Working with real people, People who do not have a sense of Jesus and his amazing grace; never once asked the denominational background and have believed more because of where my allegiance lay. However, I have found the opposite affect. Many torn and jaded because of denominational banter. Here's what I suggest, we celebrate our theology, but do not allow it to define where where practice our theology. Above all, we are called to believe that Jesus is savior and to make disciples. Last time I checked, divide did not help accomplish either of those realities.

Brake so you don't BREAK!

It's summer, everyone it seems is on vacation. Everyone it seems is taking a moment away from their routine. All the while, you are wondering, When is my break?, Do I ever get a chance to break away?, If I leave how will I make it? Listen, the reality to take vacation or break is difficult. Most of us live paycheck to paycheck (75% I heard once!) So with that reality many of us cannot afford to take a break. With the stress of bills, providing for our families, the tension has never been greater. There is a real necessity to work. 

However, your body will need a break, whether you plan one or not. Our bodies were created to run, to move, to be used. But without proper maintenance, your body cannot keep up. You will either plan to get away or your body will make you. This happens all to often, when you move forward with pace and eventually get sick. The sickness hits hard because of the lack of rest you've given it. So if you're saying you can't afford to take a break, I would argue that you cannot afford NOT to take a break.

Taking a proper break physically, mentally, emotionally will help you sustain life's trials. It can also build your spiritual strength as well! Jesus took breaks all too often (Luke 5:16) to get away, pray and recharge. We would benefit if we did the same. My push is simple is a world where we are constantly taught to Go, go, go, we would benefit to stop every once in awhile!

5 Ways to ask your child "How was your Day?" and Why it's Important

    The world is more connected today than it has ever been. We have text messaging, direct messaging, and a phone at our sides at all times. In a time when we are so connected, how can we also feel so disconnected? Fostering connectedness among parents and children can be difficult . Often times, the question “How was your day?” is answered by a quick “good” and parents are left feeling closed off. Here are 5 questions that parents can ask their child instead of “How was your day?” that will foster better communication.

1. What made you smile today? I love this question because we can often focus on the negative aspects of the day. Children can do so also. However, when you ask a child what made them smile you are training them to focus on the positive aspects of the day. Teaching a child to focus on positive aspects can go a long way and carry them all throughout their childhood right into adulthood.

2. Does everyone have a friend at recess/lunch? What a perfect question to teach a child empathy! Empathy, is an important skill learned in childhood and teaches the ability think about others feelings. If a child can grasp this concept early in life, their ability to remain empathetic in the future is more likely. Even if this question is asked and an appropriate answer is not given, the child will be more likely to think about this concept at his/her next recess or lunch break. We don’t want to burden children to being friends with everyone, but helping children be aware of such feelings is important.

3. Did you tell anyone thank you? An ungrateful soul is difficult to navigate. We have all been at that place where we are trying our best to serve, only to be met with a disgruntled look or an absence of acknowledgement. How rude! Challenging your child to think about times when they are actively using “thank you” goes a long way and breeds kindness in the world. Teaching this kindness and gratitude should be goals for every parent.

4. What inspired you today? We are all created to be dreamers and explorers. You don’t have to teach a child to be curious they just naturally are! Asking a child about their “inspirations” can help groom growth. It’s important as parents to find and listen to what inspires their children so that they can continue to fan their child’s flame. Do you know what inspires your child? Find out today!

5. What are you looking forward to tomorrow? Forward thinking, moving forward and thinking ahead; these are essential for the tomorrow’s leaders. When fostering communication with your child, asking about tomorrow is important. It teaches them to think ahead, this helps develop critical thinking skills. Additionally, asking about tomorrow helps them remain hopeful. In life, one of the hardest things to overcome is hopelessness. Even on bad days, a child can learn to remain hopeful, if they focus on tomorrow. We can’t rid our children of terrible days, but we can teach them to look forward if we keep this onward focused!

These are just a few ways we can steer from closed ended questions and foster great communication with your children. Do you have others that you like to use? Please feel free to share in the comments below. Communication is more than just talking, it’s asking the right questions to help the speaker feel understood!

Restore

There are a few things that get me more excited than a good "resto-mod." What's a resto-mod? A resto-mod is a where a mechanic/car enthusiast takes an older bodied car and transplants a newer motor in the vehicle. Resto-mods can also sport upgraded braking systems, sounds systems, as well as other modern luxuries. Thus giving it a new feel with the classic exterior. Excuse me as I geek out; I once ran across a blue 1976 Celica GT sedan with a Nissan SR20DET. The set up was simple and captivating. A classic-timeless exterior, with a new motor; thus new life gives way. The chirp of the blow off valve was exhilarating, the color was captivating and the car just breathed new life.

In the same light, this is how our spiritual lives are. When we enter life and the years get tacked on, Jesus gives us restoration. He gives a new motor, fresh brakes, an upgraded sound system.He gives new strength, new power and sends us down roads we would have never imagined. For some of us, we've gotten a hint of the upgrade years ago, but have long since forgotten the aftermarket part, we just take it for granted. "it's stock in our minds." However, we must not forget that where those parts come from, there are plentiful upgrades and infinite tuning.

Jesus does not want to leave us stock, he wants to restore us and upgrade us. Not only that, but he wants to send us on journeys and adventures we never would have made on our own.

2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!